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Cut the comparisons between stay-at-home and working moms

Posted: September 8, 2014 8:31 p.m.
Updated: September 9, 2014 6:00 a.m.
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Stay-at-home mothers have long days filled with children that sometimes seem overwhelming. Working moms have long days at work and then come home to a house full of to-do lists and children needing their time and attention. We all work hard for our children.

 

Mothers everywhere are relishing in a few quiet moments as their kids head back to school. For me, the start of preschool next week and school this week means I get to work during daylight hours instead of typing late at night in the office like the woman from the crypt. I also lose my helper, and my 4-year-old loses her best big sister playmate all day, which means I am subjected to a lot more playing "Frozen "and doll house and "I’m-the-cat, you’re-the-owner" type shenanigans.

I honestly get sad when my kids go back to school. I miss the unscheduled fun of summer and the level of bonding that comes without hurried weeknights. But, I still appreciated this video from What’s Up, Moms? (the same hilarious mommies who brought us the “I’m So Pregnant” parody.)

In this video, the moms take to Target -- alone -- once their kids head off to school. They sleep on the furniture, watch the TVs and even do a happy dance when they realize they get to use the public restroom alone. I’m with ya, ladies; there’s nothing quite like getting to go the bathroom without a tiny and surprisingly opinionated audience ogling you from across the stall.

But I knew this video was an exaggeration. No mother is seriously out celebrating with feather boas when her children return to school, even if they do allow themselves a few minutes of much-needed "me time." So I was surprised to see in the comments section of this video that a lot of viewers saw the video as a slap in the face to working moms. Comments bemoaned how stay-at-home moms have it so easy and how it must be nice not to have to work and be able to play at Target all day.

Why, oh why does everything always have to come down to comparisons between working and stay-at-home moms? Seriously, who cares who has it easier or better or luckier? Just do your own thing and be the best darn mom you can possibly be.

No, these women in the video -- or any other stay-at-home mom -- were not seriously out napping at Target.

The bottom line is, motherhood is hard work no matter how you do it. I don’t know a single mother -- working in a career or at home -- who isn’t pushed to her mental and physical limits every day. Stay-at-home mothers have long days filled with children that sometimes seem overwhelming. Working moms have long days at work and then come home to a house full of to-do lists and children needing their time and attention. We all work hard for our children.

We also all sacrifice for our children. That may mean pinching budgets as a stay-at-home mom, or missing out on milestone moments to help provide for the family as a working mom.

So instead of arguing over who works harder or who is making better choices, I wish mothers could all just agree that the one thing we have in common is we are all insanely blessed. First, we have children. Blessed. Those of us who need to work are able to find jobs to help support their families. Blessed. Stay-at-home mothers are able to make ends meet without two incomes. Blessed.

Most importantly, we get to kiss our children goodnight and good morning and know that everything we do in between is for them.

What did you do on the first day back to school?

 

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