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It happens everyday

Katrina Moses

Posted: October 20, 2016 1:57 p.m.
Updated: October 21, 2016 1:00 a.m.

According to a study done by The Violence Policy center in 2012, South Carolina was ranked number two in the states with the highest rate of women murdered by men. The report utilized data from homicides involving one female murder victim and one male offender. According to them now, South Carolina is ranked number five, which in my mind is just as bad as being ranked number two. 

I had a woman come to the newspaper in the last few days ask if she could do an advertisement. I do not handle advertisements at all, but I asked her what it was for and that I may be able to direct her to someone in advertisement and sales. She has been in abusive relationships in the past, and she felt as though there were not enough help groups here in Camden or Bishopville that focus on emotional abuse. She said the ones she has been to in recent years have always focused on physical abuse, not really mental or emotional abuse. She also said that there was a group here a few years ago, but people stop going. I asked her, what the advertisement would say. She had no clue. Then I inquired, “Are you willing to teach a class about emotional and mental abuse?” She told me she was not strong enough for that yet. 

We talked for a few more minutes. I took her name and number down. 

Therefore, can someone direct me in the direction of a help group in those two cities that cover emotional and mental abuse?

While she and I were talking, we discussed that men get abused as well. It may seem strange since men are stereotypically known to overpower women and demean them, but men can be physically and emotionally abused.

Helpguide.org gave interesting information on how men get abused and why they stay in the relationship.

For example, there are men who strongly believe in not hitting a woman and there are females who use that to their advantage. They hit men and yell at them often because they know he will not hit them back. Secondly, some women like to control men. Some women use children as pawn pieces, and tell the men they will never let their children see him again if he decides to leave. 

I remember when I was in high school, some group (I cannot remember who) came and talked to us that men get abused. The woman who talked to us showed us video clips from the TV show “Teen Mom” (it was popular when I was in high school and I do not know why). At the time, a young lady name Amber Portwood was on there, and she would often times hit and yell really loudly at the father of her child.. And ever since then, I have tried to research stories of men getting abused by women.

Helpguide.org also said these men may not leave because they want to protect their children; they feel ashamed and believe law enforcement will never believe them. The website even touched on the fact that religion often has influence in these types of relationships. Some men stay because, according to their religious beliefs, they are supposed to stick with their wives no matter what.

This was just food for thought. And if anyone wants to start a domestic violence help group that talks about more than physical abuse- spread the word because others might be out there who need it, or want to help teach it. You can even contact me. 

(Katrina Moses is a staff writer for the Chronicle-Independent. Email responses to this column may be sent to kmoses@chronicle-independent.com)

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