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Reunion season
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What is it about a high school reunion that makes people go crazy?

To be fair, my own high school reunion isn’t for another two years, so maybe the excitement will set in around early spring in 2013.

But within the past several weeks, I’ve noticed that more than a few people are hitting the gym and mall in anticipation of “high school reunion season.”

I actually like the idea of high school reunions. Having the opportunity to catch up with friends you haven’t seen in at least a decade would be fun. 

However, I’ve seen enough cheesy ‘80s and early ‘90s movies, as well as more than a few old Jenny Jones “Look at me: I went from geek to chic” talk show episodes, to make me secretly wish that my own high school reunion would morph into the ultimate exhibition of role reversals, down to the dramatic entrance of the once-bullied nerd who has gone on to create some multi-million-dollar web company. 

Oh yeah, and he’ll have to have some insanely attractive supermodel on his arm. And the supermodel has to be young.

But, alas, daydreaming about a highly dramatic high school reunion -- or even a high school reunion where you can catch up with old friends, for that matter -- will be nothing more than a fantasy for my generation. Because thanks to Facebook, I already know what everyone is doing now. 

I have nearly 1,000 “friends” on Facebook, which includes nearly every single person in my small Columbia High School graduating class. 

And while I promise that I’m not a creepy Facebook stalker, I already know who has gotten engaged, married or divorced since we walked across that graduation stage nearly a decade ago. I could tell you who’s had cute (or in some cases, not-so-cute) babies, who’s started their own business and who hates their job.

For goodness sakes, I could probably tell you what half of my graduating class had for lunch before we arrive at what I’m guessing will be some hotel ballroom in downtown Columbia. 

And, like at a high school reunion, you can carefully craft the facade you want people to see on Facebook, selecting only the best of your pictures to display prominently on your wall and witty quotes to include in your “About Me” section of your profile.

Logging on to Facebook every day is like attending a near-constant high school reunion.

But the real beauty of high school reunions, I’ve been told, is not the awkward small talk with people you haven’t really talked with in several years. It’s having the opportunity to see some of your old classmates knock back one too many drinks and finding out that you all still know every single word to Nelly’s hit “Hot in Herre.” (Yes ,people, I only graduated in 2003.) And that, I’m guessing, is what makes the whole high school reunion worth going to.

So, yes, the jury’s still out on whether or not I will attend my high school reunion -- a reunion I’ve heard is already being planned right now.

But even if I don’t go, I’m sure it won’t feel like I missed anything.

Let’s be honest, I’m sure someone’s going to post the pictures on Facebook.